Recently I have talked about Values, Morals, and Prayer in schools, and how we as parents can take time to sit with our children and talk about Bullying. I think most, if not all of us, want to protect our children with all of our being. I can't imagine my life without my kids. I just don't think I would be able to function. I can't even begin to imagine how the parents, friends, co-workers, family members are feeling to those that have been killed in CT a week ago. When does that pain go away? I just can't fathom the thought.
I will start by saying that my children went to an absolute amazing elementary school. The teachers were kind, they were caring and had an amazing way that they dealt with the children. I volunteered as much as I could, and was the PTA president at one time. I loved the school! Then my son went to Middle School, oh those wonderful years of raging hormones, popularity contests, and more work, and no play. Where do I fit in? Who am I and who am I SUPPOSED to be to feel a part of the group? The questions that I am sure most new middle schoolers have roaming their brains. When that school year came around my son was excited about new ventures, new friends, doing a good job, and growing up. Like I have said before, he expected school to be that fun place, like he just left the year before, but it wasn't. It was a more serious place that made you feel like you were in the middle of a tornado and not knowing which way to turn.
Although my son was in all Honor's classes, and his teachers seemed very nice, there was more to school now than just those things. There was bullying, competition, figure out who are your "friends," and so on. What made you popular, what was in, what was not, what should I wear, were all questions that consumed the mind of most middle school kids. My son was a little bit more mature than most and he went to school to learn. He didn't care if he wasn't wearing the most expensive clothes, he knew he dressed nice. He didn't care if he had the latest name brand sneaker, he wore the knockoff just as proud. He didn't care if he wasn't on his second girlfriend, much less his first. He didn't care if he was popular....he just wanted to be nice, the person that he always was and he couldn't understand why his so called "friends" were all changing into people he knew they were not. It was sad to see the disappointment as the year continued.
My son got good grades, he worked hard, but the school time just wasn't the same. He was overwhelmed with back to back projects, reports, tests, and the over reiteration of subject material was getting boring. He usually picked up thing quickly and wanted to move on. School started to become boring, and yet homework was just too much, even in my opinion.
One day my son came to me and said, "Mom, I want to be home schooled." I laughed. Straight up laughed and thought, you have got to be kidding me. I answered, "NO way." He brought me computer print off's of statistics of children that have been home schooled, and how they progressed more rapidly than public school students. Student's home schooled attended college and most of the time graduated to of their class. That they got really good jobs and were productive citizens in their communities. What could I say? I looked at the paper's my son brought to be and I still wondered if "I" could teach my son what he really needed to know to survive in the world. What about socialization, would he be able to function in the "real" world? Questions swirled my brain.
After some research, I decided that I would indeed home school my son. Well, I had a daughter as well who was still attending the elementary school. I didn't even consider home schooling her as well, she was in a great school, with great teachers, why would I take her out? One day after hearing discussions on home schooling our son, my daughter said, "What about me?" I said, "Well, you will still go to the school you like and I will be here just like every other time." She said, "Can I be home schooled too?" At first, I didn't want to home school my daughter simply because I thought it was important for her to get those basics that are taught at that level, then I thought why not, if I am home schooling one, I sure can do both, BUT my daughter had to give me a good reason to be home schooled just as my son did. So she said to me, "I want to be home schooled so I can learn more, so no one can pick on me, so I am not called fat by________ on the playground, so I can be home with you."
I then proceeded to look up curriculum's for both children. I found one that I thought was on the level that they would be learning in public schools. I found a challenging and well organized set of books that would get us started on this new way of schooling. The first year I had to "unschool," this basically means that I had to learn and teach myself that the way my children were learning was NOT like the public schools and I needed to stop thinking that they had to do project, reports, research, have one hour long classes, short breaks, etc. I needed to be laid back in the way they learned things. With that I saw such great absorption of information. My daughter taught herself cursive handwriting and it's beautiful. She is an amazing speller and although she had just turned 9 she is reading books like "Little Women," "Harry Potter," and much more. She knows how to do simple Algebra equations and knows easily how to multiply and divide. She knows her states, and working diligently on her capitols. My son had just turned 13 and is learning about Roman Emperor's, about other countries cultures, Civics and Algebra/Geometry. I compare their learning by talking with other parents and I must say that my children have been learning so much more with that one on one it is just remarkable. In that first year I have seen my son's bright eyes again, his humor, his dedication, and his want for learning!
Home schooling has been by far the best decision that I have made for my children. They are still social in activities such as Boy/Girl Scouts, Guitar/Voice lessons, Shooting practice, and much more. A lot of people ask me about the socialization and don't I think it will effect them as they get older. I simply say, "In the schools systems today, children are so protected by right and rules and act as though they are in charge. The have moral issues, and don't hesitate to hate and have anger....I don't want my kids to know that type of socialization." My children are doing great where they are at this moment in their lives.They are even jumping up to the next grade so, my 9 year old will be in 5th grade now, and my 13 year old will be starting 9th grade. It doesn't matter they are young, it matters that they grasp, understand and learn the information provided to them.
I have happy, healthy, protected children and I am so glad that I am schooling them. I am their mom, their teacher, their protector and about 100 other things as well, but that is the way it's supposed to be. I don't have to worry about some crazed maniac entering their schools and shooting, I don't have to worry about bomb threats, I don't have to worry about them feeling insecure because someone else made them feel like they don't fit in, I don't have to worry about bullying anymore, and I don't have to worry that my children are taught the wrong information. I don't have to worry......and that makes me happy too.
Is home schooling right for you? There are tons of informational websites, books, and forums that you can look into. I use Alpha and Omega Curriculum for my children. There are many other curriculum's out there that you can put together to suit your child's learning style. If you are not happy with the way your child is behaving or feeling, if you see him/her being dark and quiet, please talk to them. IF there is a will there is a way to home school. It's not for everyone and that is ok, but if you are interested at all, I hope you look into it, it is very rewarding in itself, and to see my children now compared to when in public school, what a difference!
Good Luck and God Bless!
Saturday, December 22, 2012
Thursday, December 20, 2012
Bullying in schools!
Where does bullying come from? Does is start at home with sibling rivalry? Does it come from abusive households? Does it come from observing other children's behaviors that they have learned, or even just possibly "human nature?"
I know what I do in my own home to prevent bullying, not that either one of my children are bullies, but there are times that I see behaviors that I put a quick stop to. I have always been that mom that talks to their children like little adults. My husband and I used to squabble over how that worked or didn't work. My husband, a farm boy, said a quick light swat to let them know you're serious will stop them from doing something you don't want them to do. I on the other hand, as a woman, like to talk things out, sometimes, until yes, I am blue in the face. I found that when children are small and you give them a swat for doing something, and just saying, "NO," they don't quite get what they are doing wrong. Remember they are still quite new to our world, and things need explained to them. Kind of like driving a car, you aren't just put in a car for the first time and told to go, you are explained the rules of driving, you learn about the steering, the gas and break pedals, and so on. Kids need that same explanation when it comes to doing things wrong.
My son would do something, let's say throw a toy, and I would sit my son down and say, "we don't throw our toys, the reason we don't throw our toys is....blah, blah, blah." I would ask him if he understood why we don't throw our toys, and with his big eyes, he would look at me and shake his head yes. I would proceed to ask him to give me a reason why. I did this to make sure he did hear me, he understood, and so that I knew he was growing in focusing on listening. He would repeat me, many times word for word. I think this would drive my husband nuts, but I can say, my son never threw another toy again! I did the same with my daughter after she was born. It is important to explain to children why something is wrong instead of just yelling out, "NO" and moving on. Their brains sometimes don't quite get the whole reasoning why.
The first time I saw my son with a lighter, I pulled up stories on the internet of other children that played with matches and lighters and ended up burning down their homes, and sometimes, even killing a family member or pet. My son was very scared that this could happen to him and again with teaching how to responsibly use a lighter and talking about when it's ok to use one, we never had any problems after that. Children need direction, that is the bottom line. That is why they are "children" and we are "parents." It is OUR job to teach our children, not only that things are right and wrong, but WHY they are such.
I feel that in today's world, the bullying in the schools, is out of control. Kids are bullied for wearing glasses, for not wearing the right shoes, for wearing an unattractive outfit or gaudy jewelry. They are bullied and made fun of for not having a boy/girlfriend, for having too many. For being too skinny, for being too fat, for being the tallest girl or shortest boy. The reasons are endless in our schools. Ask your own children, are they being bullied? IF so, why? Are they too smart, does the teacher like them, are they a little slow on learning or ask a lot of questions? Do we scold our children for being WHO they are? NO, absolutely NOT!!! It needs to be explained that we are all individuals with very different and unique features. We are special in our own right because we were made to be as such. I do not tolerate any bullying. This world is full of adults who judge, and in a sense, bully others. When are we just going to accept one another for the people that we were created to be?
The first year of Middle School for my son was one of great change and challenge. He just left a wonderful elementary school with happy teachers, play time, fun learning techniques, and kids who got along. Now he steps into a school with the same ideas in his head from what he has learned all of his school days life. He is expecting to walk into a place where teachers are happy, the students are cheerful, and learning is still exciting and fun, but wait......it's nothing like that. It is a prison of seriousness beyond understanding. How does one deal with such change? How can they be thrown into a snake pit of children that are willing to climb over each other, and are mean just to be "popular." In my 6th grader's mind, what is "popular," and why is it so important to be there? My son was coming home from school, and over about a month, I have watched my huge hearted son become sad and tired. He wasn't the cheerful boy, the crack up I once knew. The homework was taking over and projects were non stop. Although my son was in Honors, he was feeling the effects of school. I asked him one day if the work was too hard and he said,"no, not at all." I asked if he was bored in school and again, he said, "no, he was fine." I knew this was not true, but I could not put my finger on what was going on.
One day, my son came home from school and we were talking. I asked how his day was and he just simply said, "good." I looked down and saw grass stains on his knees. I asked him if he feel today at school, he said, "no, why." I asked him where he got the grass stains and he looked at his pants like he didn't realize there was evidence of something left behind. I saw his face and he looked at me in my eyes. I knew that something was totally wrong. Now understand that my son and I have a very strong bond, and I can almost read every look on his face. He came out and said that a kid at school pushed him......
Well, let's just say that after a long conversation about bullying and how it is my job to protect him, we tried to figure out a solution. I thought about this, and again my Italian/German side wanted to come out fist a swingin' but I decided to have faith in the school system. I contacted his teacher and explained the situation. I told her that we had two choices; since she was the teacher and has dealt with this type of behavior in the past that she could take care of it immediately, or option 2, I come in and take care of it, and I sincerely warned her, she wouldn't want that. The next day the teacher took my son AND the bully out to the hall. She asked the kid if he pushed my son and with a smile, said, "yes!" Straight to the principles office he went. He did get in school suspension for a few days and I was happy about that, BUT now what do you do about all of that kid's friends that he went and told that my son got him in trouble? For days my son walked down the hall and heard, "Why did you get ________ in trouble, that's not cool man." I explained to my son that HE did not get this kid in trouble, that the kid got HIMSELF in trouble! I also said that he needed to hold his head high and not let this bother him at all that it was nothing that he did, but instead, something that this other kid was dealing with.
I personally felt it was a "just because I am cool and popular, I can do what I want, and it's not a big deal" type of thing going on, but even so it was unacceptable. I started to wonder why this kid would act in such a manner, and then it became a little clearer. This child was a spoiled boy who was able to get away with things. His parents were perceived to have money and the kids played on a sports team and were known. Well, that doesn't matter to me. So where does the circle start, my opinion, at home!
We need to take time with our children, explain the importance of bullying and what it can lead to. Our children are stressed to the max with meeting school criteria for learning, tests, projects, homework, trying to keep some social life, as well as extracurricular activities. It may be a much needed reality to sit with our children and talk about how bullying or even being bullied can lead to suicidal deaths. Below is a list of factors and statistics that may be of importance to you when talking with your own child.
This again is a topic that we as parents need to discuss with our children. Let them know that it's ok to delete a member that is bullying them, it's ok to ignore text messages that are inappropriate, and let them know that no one has the right to be mean to them. They have got to have your love and support and openness to these subjects, because to be honest.....they have no one else. Friendships aren't like the ones we grew up with. Most people will turn on a friend if a "popular" kid is bullying them.
If you know a child that is the one doing the bullying, it is your responsibility to talk with that child's parent about the subject. If they blow you off, seek additional help from the school. You can even talk to them anonymously. If you know your child is bullying others, please, please make time to sit with your child and talk to them about the consequences of their behavior. Tell them about teen/child suicides and make them understand. Make them repeat it back to you. Make them open up to why they feel they need to bully. It could be that someone once did it to them. Remind them how THEY felt if so. It might be to "fit in" or be "popular"....whatever the reason, show them articles of outcomes of bullying. I have found tons of information online regarding bullying, but it all has to start at home!
We all love our children, they will always be loved with the good and bad that they do, it is our human nature to protect them and love them, guide them, and support them....that's the easy part in my opinion. The part that is hard is disciplining them, teaching them, and making them understand right from wrong, not just telling them...."Because I said so!"
I hope that this gives you a reason, even if you don't think you need one at this time, to sit with your child, talk about their feelings and about bullying. Be blessed, love your child, and remember they need you as their direction pamphlet to life!!!
I know what I do in my own home to prevent bullying, not that either one of my children are bullies, but there are times that I see behaviors that I put a quick stop to. I have always been that mom that talks to their children like little adults. My husband and I used to squabble over how that worked or didn't work. My husband, a farm boy, said a quick light swat to let them know you're serious will stop them from doing something you don't want them to do. I on the other hand, as a woman, like to talk things out, sometimes, until yes, I am blue in the face. I found that when children are small and you give them a swat for doing something, and just saying, "NO," they don't quite get what they are doing wrong. Remember they are still quite new to our world, and things need explained to them. Kind of like driving a car, you aren't just put in a car for the first time and told to go, you are explained the rules of driving, you learn about the steering, the gas and break pedals, and so on. Kids need that same explanation when it comes to doing things wrong.
My son would do something, let's say throw a toy, and I would sit my son down and say, "we don't throw our toys, the reason we don't throw our toys is....blah, blah, blah." I would ask him if he understood why we don't throw our toys, and with his big eyes, he would look at me and shake his head yes. I would proceed to ask him to give me a reason why. I did this to make sure he did hear me, he understood, and so that I knew he was growing in focusing on listening. He would repeat me, many times word for word. I think this would drive my husband nuts, but I can say, my son never threw another toy again! I did the same with my daughter after she was born. It is important to explain to children why something is wrong instead of just yelling out, "NO" and moving on. Their brains sometimes don't quite get the whole reasoning why.
The first time I saw my son with a lighter, I pulled up stories on the internet of other children that played with matches and lighters and ended up burning down their homes, and sometimes, even killing a family member or pet. My son was very scared that this could happen to him and again with teaching how to responsibly use a lighter and talking about when it's ok to use one, we never had any problems after that. Children need direction, that is the bottom line. That is why they are "children" and we are "parents." It is OUR job to teach our children, not only that things are right and wrong, but WHY they are such.
I feel that in today's world, the bullying in the schools, is out of control. Kids are bullied for wearing glasses, for not wearing the right shoes, for wearing an unattractive outfit or gaudy jewelry. They are bullied and made fun of for not having a boy/girlfriend, for having too many. For being too skinny, for being too fat, for being the tallest girl or shortest boy. The reasons are endless in our schools. Ask your own children, are they being bullied? IF so, why? Are they too smart, does the teacher like them, are they a little slow on learning or ask a lot of questions? Do we scold our children for being WHO they are? NO, absolutely NOT!!! It needs to be explained that we are all individuals with very different and unique features. We are special in our own right because we were made to be as such. I do not tolerate any bullying. This world is full of adults who judge, and in a sense, bully others. When are we just going to accept one another for the people that we were created to be?
The first year of Middle School for my son was one of great change and challenge. He just left a wonderful elementary school with happy teachers, play time, fun learning techniques, and kids who got along. Now he steps into a school with the same ideas in his head from what he has learned all of his school days life. He is expecting to walk into a place where teachers are happy, the students are cheerful, and learning is still exciting and fun, but wait......it's nothing like that. It is a prison of seriousness beyond understanding. How does one deal with such change? How can they be thrown into a snake pit of children that are willing to climb over each other, and are mean just to be "popular." In my 6th grader's mind, what is "popular," and why is it so important to be there? My son was coming home from school, and over about a month, I have watched my huge hearted son become sad and tired. He wasn't the cheerful boy, the crack up I once knew. The homework was taking over and projects were non stop. Although my son was in Honors, he was feeling the effects of school. I asked him one day if the work was too hard and he said,"no, not at all." I asked if he was bored in school and again, he said, "no, he was fine." I knew this was not true, but I could not put my finger on what was going on.
One day, my son came home from school and we were talking. I asked how his day was and he just simply said, "good." I looked down and saw grass stains on his knees. I asked him if he feel today at school, he said, "no, why." I asked him where he got the grass stains and he looked at his pants like he didn't realize there was evidence of something left behind. I saw his face and he looked at me in my eyes. I knew that something was totally wrong. Now understand that my son and I have a very strong bond, and I can almost read every look on his face. He came out and said that a kid at school pushed him......
Well, let's just say that after a long conversation about bullying and how it is my job to protect him, we tried to figure out a solution. I thought about this, and again my Italian/German side wanted to come out fist a swingin' but I decided to have faith in the school system. I contacted his teacher and explained the situation. I told her that we had two choices; since she was the teacher and has dealt with this type of behavior in the past that she could take care of it immediately, or option 2, I come in and take care of it, and I sincerely warned her, she wouldn't want that. The next day the teacher took my son AND the bully out to the hall. She asked the kid if he pushed my son and with a smile, said, "yes!" Straight to the principles office he went. He did get in school suspension for a few days and I was happy about that, BUT now what do you do about all of that kid's friends that he went and told that my son got him in trouble? For days my son walked down the hall and heard, "Why did you get ________ in trouble, that's not cool man." I explained to my son that HE did not get this kid in trouble, that the kid got HIMSELF in trouble! I also said that he needed to hold his head high and not let this bother him at all that it was nothing that he did, but instead, something that this other kid was dealing with.
I personally felt it was a "just because I am cool and popular, I can do what I want, and it's not a big deal" type of thing going on, but even so it was unacceptable. I started to wonder why this kid would act in such a manner, and then it became a little clearer. This child was a spoiled boy who was able to get away with things. His parents were perceived to have money and the kids played on a sports team and were known. Well, that doesn't matter to me. So where does the circle start, my opinion, at home!
We need to take time with our children, explain the importance of bullying and what it can lead to. Our children are stressed to the max with meeting school criteria for learning, tests, projects, homework, trying to keep some social life, as well as extracurricular activities. It may be a much needed reality to sit with our children and talk about how bullying or even being bullied can lead to suicidal deaths. Below is a list of factors and statistics that may be of importance to you when talking with your own child.
- Suicide is the fourth leading cause of death among those 5-14 years old.
- Suicide is the third leading cause of death among those 15-24 years old.
- Between the mid-1950s and the late 1970s, the suicide rate among U.S. males aged 15-24 more than tripled (from 6.3 per 100,000 in 1955 to 21.3 in 1977). Among females aged 15-24, the rate more than doubled during this period (from 2.0 to 5.2). The youth suicide rate generally leveled off during the 1980s and early 1990s, and since the mid-1990s has been steadily decreasing.
- Between 1980-1996, the suicide rate for African-American males aged 15-19 has also doubled.
This again is a topic that we as parents need to discuss with our children. Let them know that it's ok to delete a member that is bullying them, it's ok to ignore text messages that are inappropriate, and let them know that no one has the right to be mean to them. They have got to have your love and support and openness to these subjects, because to be honest.....they have no one else. Friendships aren't like the ones we grew up with. Most people will turn on a friend if a "popular" kid is bullying them.
If you know a child that is the one doing the bullying, it is your responsibility to talk with that child's parent about the subject. If they blow you off, seek additional help from the school. You can even talk to them anonymously. If you know your child is bullying others, please, please make time to sit with your child and talk to them about the consequences of their behavior. Tell them about teen/child suicides and make them understand. Make them repeat it back to you. Make them open up to why they feel they need to bully. It could be that someone once did it to them. Remind them how THEY felt if so. It might be to "fit in" or be "popular"....whatever the reason, show them articles of outcomes of bullying. I have found tons of information online regarding bullying, but it all has to start at home!
We all love our children, they will always be loved with the good and bad that they do, it is our human nature to protect them and love them, guide them, and support them....that's the easy part in my opinion. The part that is hard is disciplining them, teaching them, and making them understand right from wrong, not just telling them...."Because I said so!"
I hope that this gives you a reason, even if you don't think you need one at this time, to sit with your child, talk about their feelings and about bullying. Be blessed, love your child, and remember they need you as their direction pamphlet to life!!!
Wednesday, December 19, 2012
Values, Morals, and Prayer in Schools. Yes? No?
I find that with the recent tragedies in CT I ponder more and more about the safety and security of our children within the school systems (private and public) around our country. Let me start by introducing myself, my name is Kimberlyn Kern, I am a military spouse, a mom of two wonderful children, a taxi driver, a chef, a maid, a Dr. at times, a supporter, and even play "dad" when my husband is out of town. I am a 2nd amendment supporter and even own two guns of my own. I love animals; my four-legged fur babies mean a lot to me. On top of all of that I am now a TEACHER! I home school both of my children. I haven't always home schooled, both kids went to public school in our town and I will add that the Elementary school was amazing. The teachers were wonderful and both kids enjoyed going to school. It is that school that the news represents Sandy Hook to be like. It's a family and I believe that most of the teachers would do everything in their power to protect the children that attend the school.
This is why I started to think about the security and safety of all of those children. Yes, I now home school, we are on year two and I will get into why I am homeschooling now a little later on, but for now I want to focus on our public and private schools that our children are sent off to every day. Children spend at least 6 hours a day in a school. This school is spent with their friends learning, not only Mathematics and Reading, but also learning about life and socialization. The children learn to share, to be polite, to be kind to one another and learn to be giving as well. They learn the importance of organization, studying hard, and success. That is only if they are being taught how to do these things.
With the constant teaching of subjects and meeting school criteria so that the school can become or maintain accreditation, somewhere along the line, teaching students about morals and values have been forgotten and/or pushed to take a back seat to learning. Yes, I think it is important to educate our children! Take a minute and look back to when we as adults now went to school, remember what we learned, how we were taught? Now look at the person you are today...you turned out ok didn't you? Our children are learning much much more that we have learned, most elementary school children are taught what we learned in intermediate school. Are our children being pushed too much? Well that's another topic for sure, but what I'd like to say is that in school, children shouldn't be just pushed in learning their "ABC's" they should be taught more on those values and morals that life has pushed aside.
Why do I bring this up? Well our schools, although there are many great teachers out there, are filled with bullies, with fights, with competition against one another, with not caring about fellow classmates, with hate and anger, with contempt, with frustration and lack of patients. There are kids that are disrespectful, they don't have regard for other people and....I hate to say this, but it's a "ME" world that is being created. I have seen first hand of even Elementary school children bullying. Little girls are telling other little girls that they are fat or ugly, they tell other friends not to play with a singled out child. I saw pushing and stepping on the heals of the classmate in front of them. I saw children slap books out of another child's hands. I have seen children push a child off the Monkey Bars, and even seen a few kids chanting "scaredy cat, scaredy cat" to another child who wouldn't jump off the top of the slide. Is this behavior one that should be just acceptable? Ask your school child if they have problems on the school grounds and listen intently as they start telling you about all the things that go on. Do you want your child bullied? I don't think you want to raise a bully that is for sure? But what is the reaction of a child that is being picked on, left alone, talked about, made to feel bad about themselves?
I will tell you. They become the child that feels like they are not loved, they feel sad all the time, unaccepted, alone, dark, and end up quiet and secluded. To put is simply, they have "LIFE" sucked right out of them. I feel such sadness when I see children that have been brought down so low that they can no longer see any light ahead of them.
I feel that when we take the time to lift children up, correct them in their negative behaviors, and encourage positive behavior we see kids that are self confident, caring and loving towards one another. We need to encourage that within our schools! We need to encourage that NOW before things get absolutely worse. There are too many suicides taking place with our children, there are too many dark and ill children willing to shoot others just to feel some sort of revenge or power. How do we do this, how to we change our focus from constant learning of subjects to learning about the hearts and caring of other people?
I am a Christian, I believe in a God that is loving, caring and will be there to guide us through the tough times when we seek Him. I remember the day's of having a prayer time in school. My family wasn't huge "church goers", we actually were considered the CEO of church...Christmas, Easter, Other (like a funeral). Anyway, one thing I now remember was that I was reminded everyday that I went to school that no matter what my parents believed, what was happening at home, what type of religion I was taught or not taught, I got to have a time where I knew that God was in my mind somewhere. Of course I was a child, but yet I remember the boy that was such a bully who would irritate me, and with my Italian/German background it doesn't take me long to tell people how I feel and get my hands going, but this boy who would intentionally throw that red ball at my head almost every day just got to me. My thought was, "boy I'd like to hit him, but I don't think God would like that very much." So I took that time each day in school and prayed that this boy would be nice, that he would be kind to me and although it didn't happen the next day, it did happen. One day he came up to me with that red ball and I thought, "here we go again." He didn't hit me, he actually asked me if I wanted to play dodge ball with the rest of the kids playing. I was shocked, but I took a moment and thanked God that he changed this boy's heart.
Does prayer work? That is a question only you can answer yourself, but I know for me, it does. Again, I wasn't a church goer, we didn't pray at home, all I knew was that we were Christian and even back then, I wasn't exactly sure what that meant, but it was part of our school time so I prayed. I prayed for my dog to get better, my dad to be safe at work, to have the boy stop being mean, for my little brother to stop pulling my hair. I pretty much just prayed like kids do.
What do you think would happen if we allowed prayer back into our schools? Do you think that when that one child, that kid that stays to him/herself, that kids that doesn't make eye contact, that dresses in all black has that time to "pray" or "think" or "ponder" of something bigger that when the first thought of ending his/her life, or the possibility of taking another life that "GOD" may come into their mind first? I would like to think with the support of the school and over time we will see some major changes in the school AND more so, the attitudes of our children. I think that kids will start finding a light within themselves that will make them feel good. Make them WANT to make others feel great about themselves.
So how do we do this? Will it even work? Well, we don't know. Like everything else in life, we at least need to try, what else can we do? We have to welcome "God" back into our schools, we need a presence of His love and the ability to talk to Him someplace. There are a lot of children, like myself, that didn't have the opportunity at home. I feel that we should allow that time for any child, with any religion, to have prayer. Over the announcements, a short statement or verse or poem of encouragement should be read. Allow that first negative thought of possible violence to be turned into something other than fulfilling the action. Allow our own children to reach out to those who seem distant, maybe they just need a friend, allow our children to understand that the care of each other is important and necessary in our world today!
This is my first blog and I hope to bring a few ideas and suggestions regarding our children in schools. Like this blog on teaching values, morals, and bringing God back into schools and why that may be important. We will also talk about Armed teachers, guns, teaching our children about gun safety, home schooling, video games, violet movies, mental illnesses, and much more. My only thought with this blog is to make you think about what is really important with our children. Life is so short, and as we all know, but most could not relate, with the recent events in CT life should not be taken away...for anyone much less innocent children! May your family always be safe and may you find that today is a new beginning.
This is why I started to think about the security and safety of all of those children. Yes, I now home school, we are on year two and I will get into why I am homeschooling now a little later on, but for now I want to focus on our public and private schools that our children are sent off to every day. Children spend at least 6 hours a day in a school. This school is spent with their friends learning, not only Mathematics and Reading, but also learning about life and socialization. The children learn to share, to be polite, to be kind to one another and learn to be giving as well. They learn the importance of organization, studying hard, and success. That is only if they are being taught how to do these things.
With the constant teaching of subjects and meeting school criteria so that the school can become or maintain accreditation, somewhere along the line, teaching students about morals and values have been forgotten and/or pushed to take a back seat to learning. Yes, I think it is important to educate our children! Take a minute and look back to when we as adults now went to school, remember what we learned, how we were taught? Now look at the person you are today...you turned out ok didn't you? Our children are learning much much more that we have learned, most elementary school children are taught what we learned in intermediate school. Are our children being pushed too much? Well that's another topic for sure, but what I'd like to say is that in school, children shouldn't be just pushed in learning their "ABC's" they should be taught more on those values and morals that life has pushed aside.
Why do I bring this up? Well our schools, although there are many great teachers out there, are filled with bullies, with fights, with competition against one another, with not caring about fellow classmates, with hate and anger, with contempt, with frustration and lack of patients. There are kids that are disrespectful, they don't have regard for other people and....I hate to say this, but it's a "ME" world that is being created. I have seen first hand of even Elementary school children bullying. Little girls are telling other little girls that they are fat or ugly, they tell other friends not to play with a singled out child. I saw pushing and stepping on the heals of the classmate in front of them. I saw children slap books out of another child's hands. I have seen children push a child off the Monkey Bars, and even seen a few kids chanting "scaredy cat, scaredy cat" to another child who wouldn't jump off the top of the slide. Is this behavior one that should be just acceptable? Ask your school child if they have problems on the school grounds and listen intently as they start telling you about all the things that go on. Do you want your child bullied? I don't think you want to raise a bully that is for sure? But what is the reaction of a child that is being picked on, left alone, talked about, made to feel bad about themselves?
I will tell you. They become the child that feels like they are not loved, they feel sad all the time, unaccepted, alone, dark, and end up quiet and secluded. To put is simply, they have "LIFE" sucked right out of them. I feel such sadness when I see children that have been brought down so low that they can no longer see any light ahead of them.
I feel that when we take the time to lift children up, correct them in their negative behaviors, and encourage positive behavior we see kids that are self confident, caring and loving towards one another. We need to encourage that within our schools! We need to encourage that NOW before things get absolutely worse. There are too many suicides taking place with our children, there are too many dark and ill children willing to shoot others just to feel some sort of revenge or power. How do we do this, how to we change our focus from constant learning of subjects to learning about the hearts and caring of other people?
I am a Christian, I believe in a God that is loving, caring and will be there to guide us through the tough times when we seek Him. I remember the day's of having a prayer time in school. My family wasn't huge "church goers", we actually were considered the CEO of church...Christmas, Easter, Other (like a funeral). Anyway, one thing I now remember was that I was reminded everyday that I went to school that no matter what my parents believed, what was happening at home, what type of religion I was taught or not taught, I got to have a time where I knew that God was in my mind somewhere. Of course I was a child, but yet I remember the boy that was such a bully who would irritate me, and with my Italian/German background it doesn't take me long to tell people how I feel and get my hands going, but this boy who would intentionally throw that red ball at my head almost every day just got to me. My thought was, "boy I'd like to hit him, but I don't think God would like that very much." So I took that time each day in school and prayed that this boy would be nice, that he would be kind to me and although it didn't happen the next day, it did happen. One day he came up to me with that red ball and I thought, "here we go again." He didn't hit me, he actually asked me if I wanted to play dodge ball with the rest of the kids playing. I was shocked, but I took a moment and thanked God that he changed this boy's heart.
Does prayer work? That is a question only you can answer yourself, but I know for me, it does. Again, I wasn't a church goer, we didn't pray at home, all I knew was that we were Christian and even back then, I wasn't exactly sure what that meant, but it was part of our school time so I prayed. I prayed for my dog to get better, my dad to be safe at work, to have the boy stop being mean, for my little brother to stop pulling my hair. I pretty much just prayed like kids do.
What do you think would happen if we allowed prayer back into our schools? Do you think that when that one child, that kid that stays to him/herself, that kids that doesn't make eye contact, that dresses in all black has that time to "pray" or "think" or "ponder" of something bigger that when the first thought of ending his/her life, or the possibility of taking another life that "GOD" may come into their mind first? I would like to think with the support of the school and over time we will see some major changes in the school AND more so, the attitudes of our children. I think that kids will start finding a light within themselves that will make them feel good. Make them WANT to make others feel great about themselves.
So how do we do this? Will it even work? Well, we don't know. Like everything else in life, we at least need to try, what else can we do? We have to welcome "God" back into our schools, we need a presence of His love and the ability to talk to Him someplace. There are a lot of children, like myself, that didn't have the opportunity at home. I feel that we should allow that time for any child, with any religion, to have prayer. Over the announcements, a short statement or verse or poem of encouragement should be read. Allow that first negative thought of possible violence to be turned into something other than fulfilling the action. Allow our own children to reach out to those who seem distant, maybe they just need a friend, allow our children to understand that the care of each other is important and necessary in our world today!
This is my first blog and I hope to bring a few ideas and suggestions regarding our children in schools. Like this blog on teaching values, morals, and bringing God back into schools and why that may be important. We will also talk about Armed teachers, guns, teaching our children about gun safety, home schooling, video games, violet movies, mental illnesses, and much more. My only thought with this blog is to make you think about what is really important with our children. Life is so short, and as we all know, but most could not relate, with the recent events in CT life should not be taken away...for anyone much less innocent children! May your family always be safe and may you find that today is a new beginning.
If you found this a thought provoking blog and you feel that prayer should be in schools please sign this great petition at....http://wh.gov/naTY
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